• Thomas Dehn

De-Armouring - a Guide

Updated: May 1

Maybe you have heard of De-Armouring before, or you're just curious about it. Nonetheless, here is a guide to what it is all about.

When searching for De-Armouring online

You will probably end up with a lot of different suggestions which may excite you or put you off; like anal, vaginal, or penis de-armouring, being at the center stage; often promising pleasure, amazing orgasms, and blissful being. While this is not incorrect, this may be the over-your-boundary place to start your journey, and your self-improvement work may need to start from a softer place. De-Armouring is the process of removing the protective shielding we create in our lives which are a result of blockages created by trauma, negative thought-patterns, conditioning and exreme experiences we have had. While this protection obviously is there to help and guide us, and ultimately save us. it also hinders life-force from flowing freely throughout the body - ultimately hardening and desensitizing it.

When booking a de-armouring session with Slow Bodywork, even if you book a yoni de-armouring, we always start with a conversation about where you are emotionally, and what trauma you are carrying around, which may change the nature of your session. It may be better to start with boundaries, for example, so you can feel into what is okay, and especially what is not, before starting a session.

What Actually Happens in Your Body

If you have ever experienced violence, shaming, abandonment, manipulation, or violation, or if you feel that you are subjected to negative thought-patterns or conditioning because of it, or if you tend to breathe shallowly, hold your breath, or avoid sighing with sound, you are symptomatic of having armour - also commonly referred to as "shields". Over time these experiences and patterns create stagnant energy, muscle tension, pain or even numbness in the tissue, which in turn affects our health and mental wellbeing, your relationships, work, and how you show up in the world.

In a way you could say that your body "is the sum of your experiences", and de-armouring is the process of triggering, facing and releasing those experiences in a safe container and loving space. Clients often cry, laugh, scream, curse, vomit energetically, cough, and jump around, as these experiences leave the body.

This beautiful video created by my mentor Sunny Ju can give you an example of what a session may look like:

Armour Manifested

Emotional blockages, numbness, and a lack of sensitivity in muscles is often a sign of this armour, which physically can manifest as tension. This tension and emotion is found in all your muscles to a large or smaller degree, but especially in specific muscles in the face, chest, stomach, hips, thighs, and genital area.

Core muscles like the psoas or illiacus are good examples, since they are often tense and contain a lot of repressed memory, usually related to fear and "running away". This repressed memory is stored here because these muscles are specifically designed with "survivability by flight" in mind, like for instance the little known fact that your system can actually pump adrenaline straight into these muscles to such a degree, that you can run away without feeling a thing for a very long distance, before collapsing when out of danger.

So what happens in your body when you end up in a bad situation in the schoolyard, initially making you run away, but your teacher or classmates force you to stay? All that pent up energy gets stuck, over and over again, until the area either gets pained due to stress, or closes down to avoid everyday pain. This is not only true of your hips and core back; but also your solar plexus related to powerlessness; your chest related to love; your masseter (chewing muscle) related to anger; and the various muscles and tissue in your genitals, related to sexual abuse/stress/anxiety.

To release these blockages, we engage in either exercises which activate your nervous system, like jumping, shaking, sound and movement, or boundaries work, or energetic or conscious touch, tapping, pressure point massage, breathwork, all related to coming into the body and noticing what is going on, releasing, and changing behavioral patterns. All of which happens in a safe container where you are allowed to express what you need.

Armour in Sexual Areas

As mentioned earlier, our genitals are made of tissue and muscles like the rest of our body - so naturally suffer the same potential armour. Have you ever allowed your partner to do what they want, just to make them shut up about it? How many times have you stared at the ceiling waiting for it to be over, or thought of "other things" during lovemaking to last longer, unknowingly causing trauma by dissociation? Areas like the yoni (vagina), both externally and internally, and the lingam (penis), the anal sphincter, the prostate and the pelvic floor can lose sensation and sensitivity, or be painful, as a consequence of our experiences. You may also find that there can be stored massive amounts of shame and guilt, of "wrongness" and imbalance, as well.


The process of De-Armouring

De-Armouring, as the name suggest, is to "remove armour". It is both an empowerment tool and a holistic healing therapy which utilizes breath, sound, movement, touch, massage, external or internal pressure points, stretching, shaking, conversation, talk-therapy, and various powerful exercises. It can be practitioner lead and participant guided, giving or receiving oriented, hands-on or off, and even just be about being touched or held with unconditional love, pure intention and presence. This versatility can quite effective and highly transformative for the participant, and release emotions, trauma, blockages, tension, numbness, and pain stored in the body, opening it up to pleasure, enlightenment, understanding, and better connection.

What happens in a session

First of all, your first session is special - and 30-60 minutes is added to create space to get a better understanding of your situation, teach about the give/receive principle, boundaries and emotional practices, and give you an idea of how I work. From that, unless you decide to experience the Progressive Treatment, every session will be intuitively based, depending on your situation and boundaries, but will keep the standard timeframe of 2 hours.

The session space contains two chairs, a soft, thin mattress on the floor covered with a sarong or sheet, plenty of pillows, candles, aroma therapy, low music playing in the background, and various tools used in the practice. The space is always cleansed energetically before with either Sage or Palo Santo.

The first half an hour is typically a relaxed conversation - often about your life situation, current emotional state, and anything relevant to the coming session. Often guests ask questions here. After this, you are invited to lie down to start the session, or an exercise. The whole session may just be exercises.

If invited to the mattress, you typically start by lying on your back and we decide which body-part to start with - usually lower abdomen or chest for the first time. Instructions are given, together with some body shaking and soft touch just to prepare you and land in your body.

The pressure point massage follows, with individual points pressed at a time. Once a point has been pressed for a given time, I withdraw and let your process unfold. Emotions may rise - or there may be nothing happening, in any case the space is helt for you to open up in.

This process is continued several times, depending on what happens, and we end with a short debrief.

Yoni De-Armouring

The intention of the Yoni De-Armouring is to help you remove emotional and energetic blockages, reconnect your Yoni and your heart, and provide you with a mind-body connection with your sexuality - to the effect that this may provide you with a stronger, calmer, and better experience in your body overall, activate your orgasmic potential (experiencing new, stronger, and longer orgasms with a partner), and activate of your kundalini energy. It is extremely attentive and soft, and focuses specifically on you and what you feel, and is designed to make you feel safe and relaxed.

It always starts with a back and front massage to activate the skin and lymphatic system, while relaxing and softening the body. Once the energy feels inviting, slowly and attentively, the hands move toward the temple. Relaxing, soothing, and loving touch is given outside the yoni - and only when invited in, and the Yoni is awakened and open, the De-Armouring is is started.

The De-Armouring includes Yoni mapping, pressure points, awakening strokes, gentle stretches, and other types of touch that provides awareness. There will also be talking during the De-Armouring, and you have the opportunity to address whatever comes up.

It is then finished with a delicate and gentle exit, holding your space, leaving your yoni feeling soft and velvety.